Lex (Miller Brothers Book 2) Page 13

  “Weighman?” Luce exclaims. “But why would Lex be caught up with him?”

  “He borrowed money from him for Len.”

  Her eyes widen in disbelief. “But why would he be helping his dad? I thought he felt the same about him as you, that we’re his family now.”

  “The landlord was about to throw Len out.”

  “So, how much did he borrow?”

  I close my eyes. “Four thousand.”

  “What?” Luce shrieks.

  “I know.”

  “So, what? That’s why he’s banished, because he went back on his word? But it was to help your dad. He wasn’t doing it for himself.”

  I scowl at her words. “It’s the fact he knows these guys are not good, that they’ll do anything to get their money. Trust me, I’ve heard the horror stories. After I got the call, I didn’t know where Gracie was, if she was with the ambulance people, nothing. For the twenty-minute car ride to the hospital, every single thought went through my head. I almost hyperventilated. They could have done anything to her, Luce. They could have kidnapped her, hurt her.”

  “Please, don’t—” A tear rolls down her cheek.

  “That’s why I never told you, because I didn’t want you to be completely petrified like I was. I would have gotten down on my knees and begged for our daughter. To imagine a world without her, it’s too much.” Tears stream down my face and Luce jumps up and rushes over, enveloping me in a hug.

  “Hey, she’s home, she’s safe.”

  “I can’t let that happen again. I won’t go through that panic the next time Lex decides to help him. I want nothing to do with that kind of people. We’re bringing another child into the world. I want my babies safe, not to live in a prison.”

  “But she’s going to be devastated. She loves Lex.” Her eyes meet mine, pleading with me.

  “In a few months, she’ll forget.”

  Her eyes flash in anger as she steps back. “It doesn’t work like that, Dray. She’s going to be heartbroken.”

  I raise my hands in agitation. “Well, there’s nothing I can do. We’ve just got to move on from this. I’ll go through and see how she is.” I don’t want to talk about this any longer.

  “I’ll get dinner started. She’s not the only one devastated about Lex. I’m going to miss him, as well. It felt good to have family around. He was like a brother to me, too.”

  I turn to face her. Her sad eyes stare deep into mine. “I know, firecracker, but our babies come first.”

  I will fight to the death to keep them safe.

  Chapter Eighteen

  Each morning I wake is the same.

  Hangover from hell.

  I’m on the couch, the most uncomfortable couch in the world, but right now it’s the least of my worries. I’ve lost my family, all for a man who doesn’t give a flying fuck. I don’t know why I’m even surprised. I was waiting for something to come along and stick the boot in. I had the perfect life for once, a family and girlfriend who loved me.

  Now, Abbie can’t bear to be around me. She lets me sleep here out of civic duty. Each morning, she eyes all the bottles with disdain. I know what she’s thinking, that drinking is no solution, but it’s the only way I get through it. It’s like I’m in mourning for the family I lost. I miss Gracie with all my heart. She worked her way inside and now it just aches, every minute of every damn day. I hate the pain, but I welcome it in some ways. I fucked up, should have gone to Dray and told him about Dad. I could have salvaged all of this, but out of duty to my brothers, I kept quiet.

  And look where it’s got me.

  I sit up then instantly regret it. My eyes can’t seem to focus. Last night was heavy-going; I drank way too much, and now I’m paying the price. I scrub my hand down my face and hear movement. Abbie walks through and gives me her usual glare.

  “Enjoy yourself last night?” She motions towards the bottles lying at my feet.

  “Not particularly.”

  “You could try and sort this out with Dray.”

  “I’ve told you, he said we’re done,” I mutter. He wants nothing more to do with me.

  “I never had you pegged for being a quitter. This isn’t the Lex I fell for. This guy sitting in front of me is a stranger. I get why you helped your dad, but you could have gone to Dray and told him. I can see why he’s pissed. They could have done anything to Gracie.”

  “Don’t you think I know that?” I bark, leaping up in anger. “If anything had happened to her, I couldn’t have lived with the consequences. I might not be her dad, but I love that child so fucking much. Why do you think I’m drunk all the time? It’s because I miss her so much it hurts. Luce and Dray, too. I finally had a family, and I lost it all thanks to my fucking dad.” I sway slightly, my head spinning. My body is not prepared for this kind of argument.

  “But why did you get the money for him, Lex? That’s one thing I can’t understand. If he treats you like shit then why help him?” Abbie’s eyes search mine.

  “I didn’t get the money for him. He took the loan out in my name. Weighman wouldn’t give it to him directly, but he knows I’m good for it through Dray. He told me I had to stump up the four thousand in cash for Weighman with barely a couple of days’ notice. I tried everything I could. I had money saved and was ready to pawn items to make up for the rest. When they approached me, I told them I would get them their money, I just needed a little more time but Glen took great delight in telling me it was a no-go, that he’d enjoy kicking the shit out of me after Dray made him look like an idiot. He was just biding his time, and my dad gave him the perfect opportunity. Dad doesn’t even care I’ve lost it all. He rang me to say he’d heard I’d been beaten up and that I should have been quicker and taken it from Dray’s safe. The man has destroyed my life and still manages to stick the boot in by showing he doesn’t give a fucking toss. I did it to save the house, so my brothers had something to come home to, but if I could do it all again I’d have let him be kicked out on the streets. That’s what he deserves, the rat that he is.”

  “Oh, Lex, why didn’t you tell me?” She rushes over and hugs me hard as I descend into tears. I’ve held it together these last six days but now, feeling the comfort of her arms wrapped around me, I can’t help it – it’s like a dam breaking. She rubs my back and tries to soothe me as I cry for the family I lost.

  * * *

  Dray

  Each morning I wake, it’s the same: Gracie crying. I leap out of bed to find her standing by Lex’s made bed.

  “Where Lex, Daddy?” she asks all the time. I scoop her into my arms and cuddle her.

  “He’s gone, baby.”

  “I want him back.” She sobs, and my heart breaks a little more. I want him back, too, but it still kills me to think he willingly endangered my family for our old man.

  “I know, angel. Come on, let’s get you some milk and we can sit and watch Peppa Pig.” It’s five in the morning and I can barely think straight, but Gracie needs me to comfort her right now. We settle several minutes later in the chair as she nestles into me, drinking her bottle and watching her programme.

  I don’t know what to do. Gone is the happy-go-lucky little ray of sunshine which was my daughter. Now, she just mopes and asks for Lex over and over. All the things which always brought a smile to her face do nothing to help her mood. She doesn’t even want to feed the ducks now, and it all comes back to one thing.

  Lex.

  I miss him, too. He was my brother, my friend. I miss having another guy around the house to banter and watch football with. We’d become so close, and I finally felt like I’d been given a second chance, finding the brother I always wanted. I feel lost without him. Everything is a constant reminder, and the biggest shame of all is the huge void he’s left in Gracie’s life.

  I think it was wishful thinking on my part that she’d soon forget. Every day is like Groundhog Day, asking over and over where he’s gone. It’s driving me round the bend, and seeing her little face break out into tears k
ills me. I can’t take much more. I’m at the point of a breakdown.

  Luce marches through, which shocks me. She’s not an early-morning riser, but I guess even Gracie’s cry would wake the dead.

  “Hello, baby. You watching Peppa?”

  Gracie nods and waves then continues sucking on the bottle.

  “Dray, a word.” Her tone is sharp – she means business. A part of me wants to stay here and not have to face the wrath of Luce, but I know it’s best not to anger her any more than I already have.

  I pick Gracie up and place her back down, covering her with her blanket. I lift Max to snuggle beside her as I unwillingly head into the kitchen.

  I walk through the door and quickly close it behind me as Luce turns to face me.

  “Enough is enough, Dray. We can’t go on like this. Our little girl is a shadow of herself, and I hate it. I want my happy little girl back. Every day, I cry. I miss him, too. I hate this! It’s like he’s dead and we can’t speak about him, but he was here and he made such an impact on our lives. I’m tired of living like this, and it’s only been six days. I dread to think what six months will be like, so no more. I know what he did was wrong and trust me, I will be telling him so when I see him, but you go get him and bring him home where he belongs.”

  “But, Luce—”

  “No buts, Dray, I mean it. I’ve given you time to get over your anger, and you deserved that, but now I’m putting my foot down. She’s my child, too, and I’m not going to let her suffer over a stupid mistake. He won’t ever do the same again, else I will throttle him myself.” By the look on her face, she means it.

  “I miss him, too.” A tear trickles down my face. “I can’t bear seeing Gracie like this, either. She’s breaking my heart.”

  “Oh, Dray.” She rushes over and holds me, then eventually pulls back and kisses my lips. “You are such a good man, Dray. Don’t let something like this swallow you up. We can fix it. I want Lex to be here to see this little one grow up, too.” She places my hand on her bump as I sigh.

  “I’ll fix this, I promise. I’ll bring him home.”

  “Thank you, baby. I know how hard this is, that you would fight to the death for our kids. I guess maybe Lex felt he had some duty to his dad.”

  “I don’t know, but all I want to see is Gracie smile again. I can’t take much more.” I close my eyes, and Luce sinks into me.

  “She will, baby. You’re doing a good thing,” she mumbles against my chest.

  I hope she’s right.

  Chapter Nineteen

  Abbie leaves for work and, once again, I’m all alone with plenty of time to dwell. With no job, my days are long and boring, but today is a breakthrough with Abbie. I told her the truth, and she now looks at me like she did before all this. I want things to be good between us. I need something in my life to try and fill the void in my heart. I decide today is going to be a good day. I can clean up and help Abbie, and then I need to start looking for a job.

  Maybe Ritch would give me a reference?

  I can’t exactly ask Dray.

  The disappointment seeps through my veins. It always comes back to this. For a moment, I contemplate getting pissed. Maybe being out of it is the way to go. At least it dulls the pain.

  The doorbell goes. I’m not expecting anything, but Abbie orders online a lot. I pick up some bottles on my way and head for the door. Opening it, I find not the postman but Dray.

  Holy fucking shit.

  “Good night?” He motions towards the bottles in my hand.

  “Well, I don’t really drink for pleasure at the moment,” I bite back.

  Dray’s face drops at my cold welcome. “Can I come in?” His tone is softer, so I relent and wave him in. I walk through and place the bottles into the sink; turning round, I find Dray has followed me through. I prop myself against the kitchen top. The hangover is in full swing, and I don’t trust myself to stand unaided. I’m not really in the right frame of mind to get the third degree from Dray again, but the fact he’s here is huge.

  “Look, Dray, I know I’ve said it already, but I’m sorry. I know no begging in the world will change your mind, but I’m suffering right now. In fact, I’m in Hell. The alcohol helps numb it for a while, but it still hurts here.” I thump my heart. “I miss Gracie so much. It’s like all the fucking light has gone out of my life. I love her with all my heart. I feel like I’m in fucking mourning every day for her. It’s too much to take.” My eyes drop to the floor to hide the tears beginning to form inside.

  “Gracie is heartbroken you’re gone. For six days, she’s asked over and over for you. I’d hoped she’d forget, but then I remember this is Gracie. She won’t.”

  I smile at that; she’s one smart kid.

  “I thought it was for the best to cut you off, but now all I see is the damage it’s done to my family. I just need to know whatever happens, you’ll come to me. I can’t have you running to Weighman each time you need money. I know it was for Len, but don’t ever go to scum like that,” Dray pleads.

  “But I never,” I whisper as my eyes meet his.

  “What?”

  “Dad took the loan out in my name. He only notified me of paying it back two days before the deadline. He said they knew I was good for it, living with my millionaire brother, so they gave him it on the condition I’d pay it back. I tried to find it, Dray, I honestly did, but I was a thousand short. I begged them to give me more time but Glen was more than delighted to make me pay, said I had it coming after you made him look like a laughingstock last time.”

  Dray’s eyes narrow in anger. “I am going to fucking kill Glen the next time I see him. Trust me, he will pay for ever laying a finger on you. As for Len, I’d like to say it’s a surprise, but he’s the same dirty weasel he’s always been. Why didn’t you tell me it was his debt? Why did you take the fall for him?”

  “You didn’t give me a chance to explain. I should have told him to go to Hell, but I didn’t want my brothers to lose their home.” Especially with Zack about to be released. I wanted him to have a roof over his head after all he had gone through.

  “I know I didn’t give you a chance to speak. I just heard you’d borrowed the money from Weighman and I saw red. I never want to experience that ever again, hearing my brother has been beat up and my child is missing. I fucking aged ten years that day.” His eyes meet mine and I see the hurt and anger which resides inside.

  “I’m sorry, I just couldn’t get to Gracie. They set upon me and I blacked out soon after.” I frown at the fact I was too weak to protect her.

  “Hey, what’s done is done. I admit I didn’t go about it the right way. I just heard one side and chose to go with it, so I’m here to make amends, to take you home. That’s if you want to come home?” His eyes survey my face for a sign.

  “Seriously?”

  “Yes,” he replies, smiling. “Now, we need to get some food into you to soak all the alcohol up. How about a good old English breakfast?” Dray suggests, winking. I nod, ready to help him get it going. I pull out the eggs, sausage and bacon as Dray fires up the grill.

  I’m taking out the plates when his hand rests on my shoulder, giving me a squeeze. I turn to look at him and he smiles.

  “It will be good to have you back home. The place isn’t the same without you.”

  Couldn’t agree more.

  * * *

  We pull up outside the house, and I’m a bag of nerves. Dray jumps out and grabs my case from the boot. I unclip the belt and step outside, staring at the home I’ve grown to love. Dray pats me on the back as I follow him up the drive to the front door.

  Pushing it open, I hear the familiar voices of Peppa Pig in the back ground. Just knowing Gracie is in the next room gives me butterflies. I walk through, and she’s there sitting on the rug with her arm around Max. I swear this dog is the nicest one you could ever find; he’s like Gracie’s shadow, never leaving her side. They both have such a sweet temperament, so it’s not hard to see why they are the best of fri
ends.

  Dray stands beside me as we take in the sight of them both together. He smiles and pats me on the back. “Let’s make her day, shall we,” he whispers and I nod, eyes glassy, too choked up to speak.

  “Hey, Gracie, look who’s here.”

  Her little curls bounce as she spins around to look. Her eyes widen in surprise, and it’s the best homecoming I could ever hope for watching her face light up.

  “Lex!” she squeals in excitement, fumbling to get up before running over. I bend down, ready to grab her and lift her up in my arms, kissing her cheeks over and over. She giggles as she hugs me hard.

  “Lex, where been?” she asks, touching my face.

  “I’ve not been well, so I had to go away for a while.” I don’t know what else to say. It’s not like I can tell her the truth.

  “You stay now with me?”

  Her words tear at my heart. “Yes, I’m back to stay with you.”

  “You pay with me, no leave.” Her eyes stare deep into mine.

  “Yes, I’ll play with you. I’m not going anywhere,” I reply reassuringly.

  Her face lights up and she kisses my cheek. “I lub you, Lex.”

  My eyes fill up. God, I’m fucking losing it.

  “I love you, too, darling. More than you’ll ever know.”

  I hear a small bark and look down to see Max standing before me, wagging his tail so hard. It looks like he missed me, too. I bend down and scoop him up.

  “Hey, boy, good to see you.”

  He licks my face, and Gracie giggles hard.

  “God, it’s good to see her laughing again,” Dray states as Luce walks through the kitchen door. Her face instantly brightens when she sees me, and she walks over. Dray takes Gracie from my arms as I place Max down on the ground.

  Luce envelops me in a hug and holds onto me like she’s not quite ready to let go. “Good to have you home. The place just hasn’t been the same without you.”